


Never Again

by devout2David



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-09-26
Updated: 2003-09-26
Packaged: 2019-04-27 05:47:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14418999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/devout2David/pseuds/devout2David
Summary: Well, we're all female and we all know how it feels around "THAT" time of the month! But how does Scully deal with an emergency situation AND Mulder at the same time? Apparently not well!





	Never Again

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Spooky Awards](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Spooky_Awards), and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [SpookyAwards' collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/spookyawards/profile).

 

NEVER AGAIN

## NEVER AGAIN

### by devout2David

500 words PMS challenge (or maybe a few more than 500 words) TITLE: NEVER again! 

AUTHOR: devout2David 

SUMMARY: Well, we're all female and we all know how it feels around "THAT" time of the month! But how does Scully deal with an emergency situation AND Mulder at the same time? Apparently not well! 

* * *

When Dana Scully awoke that Monday morning, she immediately knew that something was not right. The wet, sticky feel under her told her immediately it was NOT going to be a good day. 

The first day of starting her period was always bad enough, but starting it while on a case and staying in some strange hotel in a strange little town without knowing where the nearest drugstore was made it worse. Not to mention the fact that being in the field and nowhere near a bathroom was even more horrific. 

So it came as no surprise to her to find herself sitting in the bathroom stall of gas station and discovering she had absolutely NO PROTECTION left in her purse at all! Not even a goddamn tampon for Chrissakes! 

Cursing herself up and down at her own stupidity and lack of judgment at being prepared was not going to help her right then but she knew what she was going to have to do. As distasteful as it was, and not to mention embarrassing, she knew she was going to have to send Mulder out for "supplies". 

Scully cringed at the thought of even discussing such an intimate part of her womanly functions with him but to involve him and having him actually participating in this monthly ritual was downright mortifying! 

Oh, she was sure he knew the facts of life alright and how it was a natural part of a woman's life process and all that. But would he (or could he) actually walk into a drugstore and buy TAMPAX for her without embarrassment to himself or making her feel completely guilty for asking him to do it in the first place? That was the key right there. Would he ever forgive her for asking him to do such a thing for her? Scully cringed again and shifted on the toilet seat. 

She could just stay here for the remainder of the next four days and just let herself bleed herself out, but her ass would most definitely fall asleep and cut off all the blood supply to her legs (as it was doing already!). Actually it wouldn't be a bad thing as it could just stem off the blood supply to her uterus and then she wouldn't have to worry about the damn TAMPAX... but that was a stupid thing to even consider and besides, Mulder would be knocking on the bathroom door in about five minutes thinking that she had fallen into the toilet and drown. _Not a bad thought_ she mused to herself and grabbed a handful of toilet paper. Well, maybe she could just make a makeshift pad out of all this toilet paper. Just enough to get by until she COULD make it to the drugstore. It had to be better than the alternative. 

A hard knock at the ladies' lavatory door told her it was already too late. 

"Scully? Are you okay in there?" Mulder's slightly muffled voice said from the other side. 

How should she answer? Honestly or make something up? 

"No, not really." she called back. "I sort of have a bit of a problem." 

Silence. The door creaked open a crack and Mulder poked his head cautiously inside. 

"Why? What's wrong?" he asked. She could already hear the hint of worry in his voice. 

"Well, I...uh, have a bit of, uh, situation here that, uh, I think you'll have to help me with?" Scully's face reddened as she spoke the words. "You see, I, uh,...started..." 

"Started what?" Mulder asked dumbly. 

"My cycle." she answered back with a visible shiver as she shifted on the toilet seat again. 

Silence again. 

"Oh." 

Scully took a deep breath and then said, "And I don't have anything to with me." 

More silence. 

"Mulder?" Scully called out. worried now. 

Silence and then... 

"So, what can I do?" he asked weakly. 

Scully sighed, "I need supplies which in my condition, I can't get to so I'm afraid I'll need you to do me a favor and get me some ..." 

The door slammed shut. 

"Mulder?" 

No answer. 

"MULDER?" she called out, more insistently. 

Still no answer. 

Scully could not believe it! He LEFT her! Left her in her hour of desperate need! What the hell was he doing? Was he going to the drugstore? How would he know what to get? Did he even know where the feminine napkins and TAMPAX were? Oh, for the love of Christ, why ME??? 

The door creaked open again. 

"Hello?" a female voice called out. 

Scully hesitated for a moment. "Yes?" she answered back warily. 

"Uhm, the guy you're with said you had a female problem and that I should come see if I could help you?" the voice said. 

Scully, embarrassed beyond belief, said, "Yes, well, it seems I started my period and I don't have anything with me. Do you...?" 

A youthful manicured hand slipped under the door with a TAMPAX and mini-pad. "Can you use these?" 

Scully leaned down and took the pro-offered supplies from the girl gratefully. "YES! Thank you so much!" 

"I'll let your friend know you'll be out in a minute." the girl said and left the bathroom with a loud squeak of the door. 

It took Scully only a few moments to put herself back together. She calmly walked to the sink to wash her hands and noticed her face was as red as a rose. She knew how embarrassing this had been for Mulder but it had been even more so for her. 

As she exited the ladies' room, she saw Mulder standing beside the car, trying to look as if it had been the usual fare while on a case. 

"Everything alright?" he asked as she walked towards him and reached for the door handle of the car. 

"Fine." she answered back, not looking at him. 

They got into the car and pulled away from the station. 

Driving down the road, neither of them said a word. Mulder stole a glance or two at her but continued to drive. 

"Mulder?" she said finally. 

"Yeah?" 

"Thanks." she said simply. 

"Anytime." he answered back just as plain. 

Another silence stretched out before them before... 

"Scully?" 

"Yeah?" 

"What brand do you usually use? I just want to know so that if this ever happens again, I'll know what to get." Mulder said as if they were casually discussing a piece of evidence. 

Scully blushed like mad and hesitated in her answer. 

"Don't worry, Mulder, because I can assure you that this situation will NEVER happen again." 

"But just in case it does, what..." 

"NEVER AGAIN, Mulder." 

And they left it at that. 

* * *

_end_   
  


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